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Vol. 24, No. 7 • July, 2006

You can find this newsletter and some past newsletters on the web @ Freeman-Spicer.com

How to Spot a Liar by Dr. Larry Helms

A study by Dr. Robert Feldman showed that within 10 minutes of meeting a new person, 60% of people will tell at least one lie. (Applied Social Psychology, 6/2002) The average number of lies a person will tell in that first ten minutes is three. Most people in the study didn’t believe the results, but when the video-taped sessions were shown back to them they were stunned to see they had indeed lied and in many cases they’d lied repeatedly! The average American tells approximately 200 lies per day. (Gerald Jellison, USC) The most common fibs are relatively harmless ones. They’re minor evasions told to avoid hurting someone’s feelings or to avoid conflict. (Linda Jackson, Ottawa Citizen) Behavioral experts seem to agree that these “white lies” are acceptable in moderation to preserve social harmony. (Eve Glicksman, Health and You)

We know that most women tend to lie in order to make the other person feel better, by agreeing with them or simply offering reassurance. This is known among women as the classic: of course you don’t look bad in that dress, sort of lie. (Kim Wright) Men, however, were more apt to try and impress the person they were talking to by exaggerating their accomplishments . . . or even making up stories to impress others. Is one type of lie “bad”? Is the other type a “good” lie? Is one lie acceptable and the other not? They are both lies. And who lies the most? According to studies, the most frequent liars were those who had the most social contact and/or were forced to make demands on people. The most deceitful? Store clerks, receptionists, politicians, lawyers, journalists, commissioned salespeople and psychologists. Regardless of the profession or job, people who bend or abandon the truth . . . have serious credibility problems that follow them the rest of their lives.

There are two basic types of lies: Lies of Commission - Making untrue or misleading statements. Lies of Ommission - Leaving out pertinent information. Research has shown that whereas most people think they are good at spotting liars, when tested, their proficiency is no better than flipping a coin: PURE CHANCE. Even those persons whose professional function involves lie-catching do no better than the average person . . . . in fact double blind research projects have discovered that professionals such as law enforcement officers, judges, and attorneys actually do worse than lay-people simply because their experiences tend to make them overly suspicious. The reason most people are not good at recognizing a liar is because they don’t necessarily look for the “right” signs of a lie. Most people think they can catch liars based on something called “The Plausibility Factor.” The Plausibility Factor is based on two principals: First, how plausible or believable is the statement (lie)? How consistent the lie is with other things the person lied about. However, psychologists know that most people judge the plausibility of a statement, in light of what they want to believe! If you want to believe a person . . . you will! If you do not want to believe a person . . .you won’t.

Are there some behavioral mannerisms you can look for that indicate whether the other person is telling you the truth? Yes! Physiologically, the body will react to stress and some people plainly show that stress when lying. These unconscious physiological behaviors are called “tells.” “Tells” are subconscious mannerisms that reveal stress and/or a person’s attempt to hide a lie . . and the liar doesn’t even know he/she is “telling” on him/herself. But some liars can look you right in the eye and tell you the biggest “whoppers” possible and not show any physiological signs of stress. That is why polygraph machines do not detect all liars and some times a poor polygraph reader will misread stress as indicating a lie. Likewise, Computerized Voice Stress Analyzers or “thermal imaging” that detect blood rushing to the eyes, neck or nose only reveal stress . . .not necessarily lies! So it’s not possible to read mannerisms or detect expressions of stress that might indicate deceit? No! It is indeed possible to spot some liars by observing behavior, but we need to establish some “ground rules.” First let’s understand the difference in the types of liars we bump into every day and why some people get away with real “whoppers.”

First, there are three classifications of liars: “pathological”, “practiced” and “amateur.” Pathological liars are able to shamelessly deviate from propriety or from an assumed norm. Pathological liars lie constantly and for no apparent reason. Sometimes they do not know they are lying, but sometimes they do know they are lying, but cannot stop themselves. A pathological liar who abandons the truth because he/she doesn’t believe there is anything wrong in lying will not show stress even in the middle of a “whopper.”

Practiced liars - a “kissing cousin” to a pathological liar. We know that con artists, actors, and many politicians have learned to control their physiological reactions when lying through constant practice. But, you don’t have to be a member of some stereotyped profession to be a “practiced” liar. “Some liars eventually become convinced they are telling the truth” (Dr. Frank Fraley, APA) Pathological and practiced liars believe the result they want to achieve is always more important than the actions they have to take to achieve the result. They have no problem in running over other people to get what they want. Indeed, they often believe it is “cool”, clever and perhaps even shrewd to be able to “pull the wool” over someone’s eyes. Their motto: “If you’re not cheating, you’re not trying.”

Amateur Liars - are like poor poker players. The “average” human with a normal conscience will usually react in a fashion that shows an astute observer there is an unease with what is being said. Amateur liars are not comfortable lying, so even if the words are convincing, his/her body language or voice “tells” often reveals the persons uneasiness.

We are going to focus on this “amateur” or non-pathological liar, the average “Joe” we bump into every day and see if we can develop some type of mental lie detector we can apply daily. To discover the average person’s “tells” you must do two things: First be keenly observant: That means, for best results, whenever possible, observe a person BEFORE in non-stressful situations to develop a Barney Baseline of their demeanor for comparison. It is easier to catch a liar if you can compare their current behavior to how they normally act or react. Look for “tells.” Without establishing a benchmark, or “Baseline”, you will have a difficult time determining if a person is exhibiting telltale episodic stress or if their mannerisms are “normal” behaviors! Example - Try to keep the other person talking. The more a liar talks the greater the chance they will reveal the lie. The more they talk, the greater the stress, and the greater the chance of “tells.” An amateur liar speaking in a casual conversation will not feel stress and often not exhibit any “tells” if they feel the lie is socially appropriate. That same person speaking in a job interview might show some tells as the “stakes” get higher and his/her stress level increases. The same liar testifying in court might be under so much stress that the “tells” are much easier to read. Finally, all “tells” must be viewed within the context of any given situation. The “tells” are not absolute indicators of lying. Here are “tells” to look for, but remember, for best results you need a Baseline.

Tell #1 - Little or no eye contact. The old clicheʹ of the shifty eyed thief or the child who won’t look his mother straight in the eye when telling a fib is true!

Tell #2 - Blink! Blink! A “blink” is really an involuntary reflex that increases when people are emotionally aroused. [The average blink lasts 1/4 of a second.] A normal resting blink rate of a human is 10.4 to 19.7 closures a minute. A person telling a lie will often double that number to an astounding 40 times a minute.

Tell #3 - Eyeball the eyeballs! Remember your “Brainology 101." The right side of the brain stores imagination. The left side of the brain stores facts and memory. Watch the other person’s eyes when they speak: If their eyes tend to roll up and to the right, they are delving into imagination, not memory, and might indeed be manufacturing an answer or statement [a lie]. If the eyes roll up and to the left, they are probably trying to pull some fact or idea from their memory [the truth].

Tell #4 - The Pupils . . . of the eyes will often narrow because lying is stressful and stress causes the pupils to constrict.

Tell #5 - Hand in front of the mouth/face. The most obvious “tell” is when an amateur liar literally tries to cover his/her mouth or part of his/her face when telling a lie. It is the most blatant of the body language “tells” and reveals a normal person’s subconscious chagrin at telling an untruth.

Tell # 6 - Shades of “Pinocchio” The nose really does grow! One way the body reacts to the stress of being deceitful is by flooding the face with extra blood. This causes the nose to start tingling and swell - albeit not enough for you to see the growth. But, when you see people start fiddling with their proboscis . . .be alert to fibbing.

Tell #7 - Pucker Up Baby! Have you ever heard someone who is up-tight being call “tight lipped”? That is because blood actually leaves the lips under stress causing the lips to “tighten” or pucker. Liars will often purse or lick their lips when being deceitful because the lips start to feel constricted. Tight lips might indicate you may be planning on a lie of “omission”, that is, keeping something “in” and withholding information.

Tell #8 - Beware the “forced” smile. Be wary if the mouth is smiling, but there is no similar expression in the eyes or forehead. A natural smile involves the entire face. Look for “crows feet” on the side of the eyes.

Tell #9 - The Head Shift. The other person constantly moves away from face-to-face postures. The deceitful person often shows discomfort in a face-to-face situation and attempts to distance himself from that discomfort.

Tell #10 - The body held rigidly, almost statuesque or holding arms close to body (they wish to take up less space when lying). Truthful relaxed people tend to make frequent hand and arm gestures. Liars, or people feeling uncomfortable with what they are saying . . . .tend to hold themselves very still, often with their arms clasped or pinned at their sides.

Tell #11 - Liars tend to keep a physical separation from you. People who are lying in a business or social situation rarely touch you. Amateur liars subconsciously avoid physical contact and will shy away from anything more than perfunctory handshake or touches. When people are self-confident and positive about ideas and what is being said, they tend to move toward the other person.

Tell #12 - Watch their hands! People who are being deceitful rarely point a finger at others or even straight up in the air. They often “hide” their hands or keep them cupped [curl their fingers up when their hands are down]. Liars have difficulty indicating with their hands this type of legitimate authority and conviction.

Tell #13 - Liars build forts and fences. People who are uncomfortable being deceitful often put physical barriers between themselves and others. * Perhaps wearing sunglasses indoors. * Placing a cup on the table directly between the participants. * Keeping a desk/table between them.

Tell #14 - No joke . . . . . liars often stink! Remember earlier we discussed that depending on the degree of stress and the consequences of the lie being discovered, others will actually visibly start to perspire. There is a study that reveals when under pressure and when people are lying, the body secretes a distinct pungent aroma. [Two types of glands that produce a clear liquid that has no smell and a milky liquid that has the aroma.] “You’ve heard people say, ‘He’s a stinking liar.” Well, it actually does happen. The odor in our polygraph room was so bad a while back that believe it or not we had to buy some deodorizer.”Timothy Trighe, Polygraph Examiner for the Cincinnati Police Department

Tell # 14 - Listen for the absence of the first person singular pronoun - “I”. Amateur liars shy away from identifying themselves with the lie. They seldom say things like, “I liked your report,” or “I really liked that dress.” Instead they tap dance and say things like “Nice report” or “Great dress.” Excessive humor that reflects the truth. Liars subconsciously distance themselves from what they are saying.

Tell #15 - Contractions - Skilled interviewers and interrogators know the following “rule” . . . If a person says something like: “It wasn’t me” as opposed to: “It was NOT me!” There is a 60% chance they are telling the truth. [Always or never are alarm words.] The deceitful person, in an attempt to sound emphatic, often avoids contractions on their statements of innocence as they want to over-emphasize the “NOT.”

Tell #16 - Numbers - Listen for a sequential pattern of numbers if appropriate. A liar often falls into a pattern of using multiples of the same number because (1) they are easier to remember, (2) they are easier to make-up on the spot.

Tell #17 - Beware the “Robo-voice. Do you feel like you are talking to a robot? Honest relaxed people naturally use inflections in their voices to accent/emphasize a point. Deceitful statements are often delivered in a flat monotone.

Tell #18 - Liars suffer in silence! Liars are very uncomfortable with silence. They rush in at every conversational pause, even repeating what THEY have just said or adding unimportant details in an effort to fill the voice-void.

Tell #19 - Liars tend to make every statement into a question. The voice of an honest relaxed person, and even some facial features, naturally tend to lift at the end of a question . . . But if they rise at the end of a declarative statement the speaker’s conviction may not be as strong as he is leading you to believe.

Tell #20 - Beware of the person who uses excessive humor to defuse your concerns. When you ask a serious question, you should receive a serious answer. Excessive humor is often an attempt to: (1) Divert your attention and (2) Forget the facts and make you “like” the other person. Overstated friendliness or excessive laughing may just be a sign of nervousness, but it is often an overt effort to make you like the other person so you won’t challenge him/her.

Tell #21 - Be alert to the over-pregnant pause. How fast does the other person follow with verbiage after his initial response? If a person is lying, the first word or phrase may come out quickly. But, the rest of the sentence may come out more slowly because he needs to think up an explanation. “When it comes to lying, you would have to pause longer because you would want to be careful about what you are going to say.” Richard Bennet - The Pause That Confesses “The longer it takes you to formulate what you are going to say, the more likely you are to pause, so the more you are going to use an ‘um’ or an ‘ah’ to fill in the gap.”

Tell #22 - Beware the “too” indignant response. MOI? By expressing a feeling overly aggressive, the liar may be trying to cover up true feelings. “I’d never” . . . Or “I’m above that type of” . . . Be especially alert to: Always and Never!

Tell #23 - Liars seldom hold inter-active conversations; they seldom even ask you penetrating questions. Liars want to control the conversation. Liars are afraid if they engage you in a real meaningful conversation, you may take the discussion in a direction they cannot control. Liars tend to avoid answering questions or, if forced to respond, try to answer your questions with a question of their own so they do not have to deviate from their pre-rehearsed mental “script.”

Tell #24 - Talking Fast. Of course some people are “natural” fast talkers, but if rapid speech IS NOT baseline behavior it could be the other person wants to get “it” over with.

Tell #25 - Paraphrases Freudian “Slips” - A slip-of-the-tongue that is presumed to be the unconscious release of suppressed true feelings or thoughts. Freud said such “slips” were not mistakes, but were actually the manifestation of “locked-away” subconscious truths and intentions.

Tell # 26 - Mumbles. A close cousin to the pregnant pause filled “ah’s” and “um’s” - people’s voices can get noticeable higher in pitch when they lie and they are more likely to stammer, stumble or mumble. “Liars “...pause and use non-words during hesitations in their speech (uh, er and ah) - they - stutter, stammer and become tongue-tied, they clear their throats often and make other noises.” Alan Hirsch, MD Psychiatrist

More sophisticated “tells” to look for:

Tell #27 - Be alert to delayed motion. If a person is telling the truth, he tends to nod or gesture either Before or While he is speaking. If he nods/gestures after he’s finished speaking he may be trying too hard to demonstrate conviction.

Tell #28 - Be alert to delayed emotion. Whether a person is angry, surprised or amused, truthful people express their feelings as they are speaking.

Tell #29 - Grab your wallet and skedaddle when you hear” “To be perfectly honest with you . . .” - or - “To tell you the truth . . .” Someone who is telling the truth doesn’t need to pre-convince you before he even gets the words out of his mouth. Think about it: if someone has to tel you now it’s time to believe him/her . . . doesn’t that mean all the other times he/she has been lying to you? Other phrases that should alert you to potential omission-type deceit: Believe it or not . . . . Basically . . . .Kind of . . . I swear.

Tell #30 - Everything is perfect! A perfect story is a red flag to look for: One thing is usually missing from a lie . . what is bad or what went wrong. Liars tend to make everything seem rosy and “perfect.” If the story or explanation seems too good to be true . . .it probably is!

Tell #31 - Projection. In psychology there is a self-defense mechanism called “Projection.” Projection is when you project your feelings or what you would do in a similar situation onto another party. Liars often talk about how corrupt the world is, how others lie, cheat, steal, and otherwise break the Ten Commandments. It is as if they feel by pointing out the flaws in others they are concealing their own. (Or, perhaps subconsciously they are rationalizing their own flaws!)

Trying to learn all 31 “Tells” at once is frustrating. Break the task down into groups of “Tells.” Concentrate for one week on one cluster of tells and then move on to the next cluster. Eye Tells (1-4), Facial Tells (5-9), Body Tells (10-13), Verbal Tells (14-25), Miscellaneous (26-31).

Nine Ways To Discourage Liars: 1. It sounds silly, but if you can pick the office furniture, always have the visitors’ chair shorter than your own. Always sit in the higher chair. It is a subtle form of one-ups-manship and increases the stress level for the liar. Don’t make it obvious! 2. Put their statements under a microscope - ask for minute details. 3. Plow the same ground twice. Ask for figures and details to be repeated. 4. Control your ego trip. Do not ever tell them what you KNOW to be true. Don’t paint them into a corner by pointing out their lie. 5. Invade their personal space. Get close. 6. Posture echo. It creates a false sense of bonding for the liar. 7. Give them an “out.” Pretend you didn’t hear them correctly or perhaps you didn’t understand them. Give them a way to recant or change their story without embarrassment. 8. Stay calm. Never show surprise or shock. The first time you react negatively or register possible disbelief in their “story” you put them on alert and seriously reduce any chance of being told the truth. 9. Remove props that create “comfort zones” for the liar.

Delivered by: Dr. Larry Helms on 6/6/06 in Indianapolis at a conference of Indiana Bankers.

Hope you enjoyed this article. Sincerely - Edward C. Levy, President