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Vol. 29, No. 4 • April, 2011 / www.Freeman-Spicer.com
[Remembering Eli Spicer 1914-2009]
When Planning Your Retirement . . . . . . There is one important thing you should remember as you crunch the numbers for your retirement. You may need your income to be sufficient for a long time, because people are living longer than ever before, and generally, women tend to live longer than men. For example:
• The typical 65-year-old today will live to age 83;
• One in four 65-year-olds will live to age 90; and
• One in 10 65-year-olds will live to age 95.
Don’t forget Medicare - Even if you don’t plan to receive monthly benefits, you should sign up for Medicare three months before reaching age 65. Otherwise, your Medicare medical insurance, as well as prescription drug coverage, could be delayed and you could be charged higher premiums. You even can apply online. Visit: www.socialsecurity.gov/medicareonly for more information about Medicare eligibility and filing online. (Social Security Administration)
Harley Mechanic . . . . . . A mechanic was removing a cylinder-head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiologist was there waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike when the mechanic shouted across the garage. “Hey, Doc, want to take a look at this?” the cardiologist, a bit surprised, walked over to where the mechanic was working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, “So Doc, look at this engine. I open its’ heart, take the valves out, repair any damage, and then put them back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I make $39,675 a year and you get the really big bucks ($1,695,759) when you and I are doing basically the same work?” The cardiologist paused, smiled and leaned over, then whispered to the mechanic . . . . . “Try doing it with the engine running.” (Fournier)
Surprisingly . . . . . Studies show that how much people tip has little to do with the quality of service. It’s about rewarding or punishing those who engage our interest or empathy. A little flirting goes a lot further than a little faster coffee refill:
■ Waitresses’ use of makeup significantly increases their tips.
■ Female servers increased tips by drawing a smiley face on the check (though it doesn’t work for male servers).
■ Tips rose 20% when diners received two pieces of chocolate with the check.
■ Women tip male servers better than they tip female servers. (SmartMoney)
Invented . . . . . . . During WWII, General Electric was asked to invent a cheap, synthetic, all-purpose rubber. Engineer James Wright went into his lab and began mixing. The gooey rubber he invented was not what the government wanted, but it sure was fun! The engineers called it “nutty putty” and enjoyed showing it off to visitors. When toy store owner Paul Hodgson noticed people playing with it for hours at a party, he approached GE and bought a blob for $147. He and Yale students packaged one-ounce balls of it into plastic eggs and offered them for sale. By years-end, his Silly Putty had outsold everything else in the store. (An Uncommon History)
Most Workers Have Saved Just $25,000 For Retirement . . . .Most Americans have less than $25,000 saved up for retirement. And surprise! Retirement confidence is at record lows. More than a quarter, or 27%, of workers say they are “not at all confident” about retirement, according to an annual survey from the Employee Benefit Research Institute and Mathew Greenwald & Assoc. Inc. That’s up from 22% last year, which was the lowest level recorded in the two decades the survey has been conducted. Meanwhile, only 13% of workers are “very confident” about having enough money to retire, which is unchanged from 2009. While this sounds dismal, EBRI says it’s about time people started waking up to reality.
And this drop in confidence may simply be a sign that people are finally realizing how much they must save, instead of being overly confident as they have been in previous years. For example, confidence among the worst savers slipped sharply this year. The number of workers with savings of less than $25,000 and who reported being “not at all” confident about their retirement savings surged to 43% this year, from only 19% in 2007. About 56% of workers report having less than $25,000 in savings and investments (not including the value of their primary home and benefit plans) and 29% of workers have less than $1,000 saved. Plus, while 59% of workers say they are currently saving for retirement, about a third of all Americans – 34% of workers and 33% of retirees – were forced to tap into their savings last year just to cover basic expenses. “People expectations need to come closer to reality so they will save more and delay retirement until it is financially feasible,” said Jack DanDerhei and EBRI researcher. About 20% of workers said they now plan to retire later than they had desired, with the number of people expecting to retire after age 65 rising to 36%, compared with 25% in 2006. The poor economy is the top reason people are delaying retirement this year, followed by “a lack of faith in Social Security or the government,” a change in their employment situation, or simply because they can’t afford it. About 74% of workers now plan to hold paying jobs in retirement, which is up from 70% in 2010 and triple the percentage of current retirees who say they worked for pay in retirement. Nearly half of current retirees say they retired earlier than they had intended, due mainly to health problems or disability. (CNN.Money)
Divorce Verses Murder . . . . . A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, “I’d like to buy some cyanide. I need it to poison my husband.” The pharmacist’s eyes got big and he explained, “Lord have mercy! I can’t give you cyanide to kill your husband, that’s against the law! I’ll lose my license! They’ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!” The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist’s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and said, “Well . . You didn’t tell me you had a prescription.” (Nieman)
Think Short Paragraphs . . . . . Research on readability - how fast people read and how much they understand - shows that a paragraph should total 45 words, and no more than 65. That’s only about three to five sentences. To read pages of dense type with few white spaces, you’ve got to be motivated. Not much of what you write is likely to be a “must-read,” even if you’re the boss.
So give your readers a break - literally. Use short paragraphs, subheads, and visuals (if called for). The cure for long paragraphs is easy: Break them up. Does this apply to e-media? Even more so. You need shorter words, sentences and paragraphs. Particularly on screen, people don’t like to read a lot - or scroll a lot. (The New Rules of Business Writing)
Sorry - Another Blonde Joke . . . . . An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, “Hey you - wanna hear a blonde joke?” The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke cowboy, I think it is only fair given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I’m a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in Karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously cowboy.....do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?” The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, “No....not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times . . “ (Fournier)
The Gender Metric . . . . . The payoff for women’s empowerment.
1. Educating a girl one year beyond the national average boosts her earning power between 10 and 20 percent.
2. Countries with higher levels of female secondary-school enrollment have lower infant mortality, lower rate of HIV and AIDS infection, and better child nutrition.
3. The World Economic Forum’s 2011 Gender Gap Index shows that a nation’s prosperity correlates with the level of parity between women and men (in education, health, economic opportunity, and political empowerment). Countries with the smallest pages in 2010 were Iceland, Norway, and Finland; Pakistan, Chad, and Yemen had the largest.
4. According to the WEF, the U.S. could boost its GDP by as much as 9 percent by putting more women in leadership positions in business and government and working harder to correct pay inequities.
5. Women still earn 33 cents less per dollar than men.
6. In the Asia-Pacific region, countries are losing between $42 billion and $46 billion a year, according to the WEF, by restricting women’s access to the workforce.
7. When women earn their own money, they spend on their families at more than twice the rate of men.
8. Worldwide, companies perform better and produce better ideas when their highest ranks have gender diversity. (Newsweek)
Getting Even . . . . . . A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a “Dear John” letter from his girlfriend back home. It read as follows:
Dear Ricky: I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice since you’ve been gone, and it’s not fair to either of us. I’m sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you. Love, Becky
The Marine, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow Marines for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins, etc. In addition to the picture of Becky, Rick included all the other pictures of the pretty gals he had collected from his buddies. There were 57 photos in that envelope . . . along with this note:
Dear Becky: I’m so sorry, but I can’t quite remember who the hell you are. Please take your picture from the
pile, and send the rest back to me. Take care, Ricky (Nieman)
Sincerely,
Edward C. Levy
President