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Vol. 28, No. 3 • March, 2010 / www.Freeman-Spicer.com

Not even Law and Order would attempt to capture this mess.......... This is an unbelievable twist of fate!!!! At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science, (AAFS) President Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story: On March 23, 1994 ... the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus, and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound to the head. Mr. Opus had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide. He left a note to the effect indicating his despondency. As he fell past the ninth floor, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast passing through a window, which killed him instantly. Neither the shooter nor the deceased was aware that a safety net had been installed just below the eighth floor level to protect some building workers and that Ronald Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide the way he had planned. The room on the ninth floor, where the shotgun blast emanated, was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing vigorously and he was threatening her with a shotgun! The man was so upset that when he pulled the trigger, he completely missed his wife, and the pellets went through the window, striking Mr. Opus. When one intends to kill subject 'A' but kills subject 'B' in the attempt, one is guilty of the murder of subject 'B.' When confronted with the murder charge, the old man and his wife were both adamant, and both said that they thought the shotgun was not loaded. The old man said it was a long-standing habit to threaten his wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her. Therefore the killing of Mr. Opus appeared to be an accident; that is, assuming the gun had been accidentally loaded. The continuing investigation turned up a witness who saw the old couple's son loading the shotgun about six weeks prior to the fatal accident. It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son's financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of his father to use the shotgun threateningly, loaded the gun with the expectation that his father would shoot his mother. Since the loader of the gun was aware of this, he was guilty of the murder even though he didn't actually pull the trigger. The case now becomes one of murder on the part of the son for the death of Ronald Opus. Now comes the exquisite twist ... Further investigation revealed that the son was, in fact, Ronald Opus. He had become increasingly despondent over the failure of his attempt to engineer his mother's murder. This led him to jump off the ten-story building on March 23rd, only to be killed by a shotgun blast passing through the ninth story window. The son, Ronald Opus, had actually murdered himself. So the medical examiner closed the case as a suicide. (Associated Press) (Foti)

Take The Fogey Test . . . . . . . . What’s the next number in this sequence? 16 - 33 - 45?

Of course it’s 78, the fastest of the four speeds on phonograph turntables. Even those of us who never had 16 rpm or 78 rpm (revolutions per minute) should know that. Well, only 30 percent of a recent online poll answered correctly. More than half thought it was 52, a mathematically defensible but culturally obtuse response. (Chicago Tribune)

“The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time....but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” (Unknown) (Fournier)

Short - Hard - Expensive Lessons . . . . . .

•          Superstar employees will leave you no matter what you do to keep them.

•          The activity you reward will get done.

•          People motivate themselves.

•          Disrespect is the number-one grounds for dismissal.

•          Few people will take responsibility for their results until they have exhausted all opportunities to blame someone else.

•          Praise in public; critique in private.

•          Not all problems can be fixed.

•          Training is expensive, but stupid employees are more expensive.

•          Don’t expect respect if you don’t show respect. (It’s Called Word For a Reason)

L.L. Bean Follows Its Shoppers To The Web . . . . . . . L.L. Bean has never been know as a retail trendsetter. The chinos and rubber-soled boots in its latest lineup could have come from catalogs bulk-mailed decades ago. The company has build a loyal following over the past 98 years with its liberal return policy and folksy sales staff, but it nabbed the No. 1 spot in this year’s Bloomberg BusinessWeek customer service ranking by adapting to the way its customers shop now. This year, for the first time, Internet sales will top catalog orders at the $1.5 billion Freeport (ME) retailer of outdoor gear. But L.L. Bean has done more than install such e-tailing basics as designing a Web site that makes placing orders intuitive and package tracking simple. It switched to a new bank that agreed to split the cost of free return shipping to holders of the L.L. Bean credit card. It also opened the site to customer ratings and reviews of its wares, even if they’re negative. Today shoppers can chat with call center agents through instant messaging and e-mail. And by next fall, the site will add a “click and call” feature that will prompt a help call within two minutes to any online shopper who wants more information. “Wherever they want to shop, we have to be there,” says Terry Sutton, Vice-President for Customer Satisfaction. The shift from catalog to Web sales has been disruptive internally. Because of declines in phone-in order volume, L.L. Bean in April will close one of its four call centers, 55 miles from its headquarters. The 220 year-round employees affected will be allowed to work from home or another site. Although L.L. Bean management could cut cost by offshoring back-office operation, it has kept them in Maine, where Leon Leonwood Bean founded his mail-order company and his original store. The company offers competitive wages, health-care benefits, discounts, and even a pension. Sutton says that money is well spent, since happier employees mean better service, which in turn means more repeat business. “The technology has changed the game, but the basics haven’t changed,” Sutton says. “We treat customers like we’d want to be treated.” (Bloomberg BusinessWeek)

“An Older Gentleman” . . . . . . . . had an appointment to see the urologist who shared offices with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. As he approached the receptionist’s desk, he noticed that the receptionist was a very “unfriendly” woman who looked like a very mean Sumo wrestler. He gave her his name. In a very loud voice, the receptionist said, “YES, I HAVE YOUR NAME HERE, YOU WANT TO SEE THE DOCTOR ABOUT IMPOTENCE, RIGHT?” All the patients in the waiting room snapped their heads around to look at the very embarrassed man. He recovered quickly, and in an equally loud voice replied, “NO, I’VE COME TO INQUIRE ABOUT A SEX CHANGE OPERATION, BUT I DON’T WANT THE SAME DOCTOR THAT DID YOURS.” The room erupted in applause! Don’t mess with old folks! (Fournier)

Top Ten Worst Passwords . . . . . . . . . The following is a list of the most predictable passwords, and should not be used under any circumstances. Always try to strengthen your passwords by using at least one number and maybe a symbol like a comma or period.

1. 123456                                5. iloveyou                  8. 1234567

2. 12345                                  6. princess                  9. 12345678

3. 123456789                          7. rockyou                  10. abc123 (PCWorld.com)

4. Password

My One Day Employment . . . . . . . . So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day . . . . . . About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. I said pleasantly, “Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?” The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, “Hell no, they ain’t twins. The oldest one’s 9, and the other one’s 7. Why the hell would you think they’re twins? Are you blind or stupid?” So I replied, “I’m neither blind nor stupid, Ma’am, I just couldn’t believe someone slept with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.” My supervisor said I probably wasn’t cut out for this line of work. (Rodriguez)

Fixing a Scratched LCD Computer Screen . . . . . . Scratches are most likely to affect the LCD’s screen coating. So, repairs often involve polishing down part of this coating. Some repairs apply a new coating to part of the screen. Many people have reported success with Vaseline. This does not remove any coating. Rather, the Vaseline fills the scratch, making it less noticeable. Basically, you clean your monitor, then, apply a dab of Vaseline. Next, remove the excess. The idea is to leave a small amount in the scratch. Be careful how you apply the Vaseline. Use a clean, dry, lint-free cloth. Avoid paper towels and toilet paper, they could scratch your monitor. Another method is to use a new pencil eraser. Gently rub the scratch with the eraser. But, if these didn’t work, there are LCD scratch repair kids on the Internet for as little as $10. (Komando)

Management . . . . . . . When you learn that a key manager, a personal friend, has been stealing from the company, it is emotionally devastating. You may feel you can’t trust anyone - which can lead to bad decisions. The first step is to understand that theft is a business issue and needs to be addressed as such. In most cases, it happens because there’s a problem with procedures in your business. Maybe you’ve neglected certain checks or balances. Maybe people weren’t following procedures. Maybe you just weren’t paying attention, But you shouldn’t stop trusting people. Yes, a small number of individuals are thieves. But the vast majority of people are honest. So don’t run your company like nobody can be trusted - but do have the right procedures in place. (Inc.)

Gentle Thoughts For Life . . . . . . “The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friend.” and “The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement...” “Did you ever notice: The Roman Numeral, for forty (40)           

are XL?” (Fournier)

Freekibble.com - gives food to dogs in shelters when you correctly answer a daily trivia question.                                            

Sincerely,

Edward C. Levy

President